Giving Thanks In All...

I feel like a heel sitting here in the loveseat recliner while Kyle decorates the Christmas tree but in all honesty, I think he very much enjoys doing it himself. He's a pro. He does it every year. He likes getting it "just right". And never complains. He loves to create & is amazing at making things beautiful.

This week has been super busy with Bible Study on Monday evening & worship team practice Tuesday evening. Two of our nieces (Savannah & Ciera) spent Tuesday night with us which was a fun treat & then yesterday I spent the ENTIRE day in the kitchen. Despite the fact that I was completely in my element (I LOVE to cook/create in the kitchen), I was a little disheartened that I couldn't just sit & chat since Bri came over for a bit (to see MaKayla no doubt) & then Mom came down for a few hours. It was a busy, bustling house but everything that needed to get accomplished (ham baked, chop-chop, seven-layer-salad, chocolate dessert, pumpkin pie, green beans, mashed potatoes, noodles & hot rolls made) got done & I felt like I had moved mountains! :) I'm so thankful for the strength that God gives when we need it most.

With today being Thanksgiving, Kyle was home from work. It was wonderful to wake in his arms as the sun began to rise & together reflect on God's goodness to us & to our family. We were able to have coffee & study God's Word together...two of my favorite things to do. He was able to find the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade on-line for the girls to watch which was fun. In the midst of that, we started pulling boxes & rough totes full of Christmas trees/decorations from the basement in preparation for our annual tradition of adorning our home with lots of green, warm lights, ornaments that hold memories/tell stories & various nativities. We very much enjoy the Christmas season & reflecting on the significance of the birth of Christ.

We shared lunch with Kyle's family & then took advantage of the warm afternoon (before the weather drastically changes) by hanging Christmas lights on the house per Mal's constant persistence over the past several days. MaKayla has asked to have them every year since we moved here seven years ago & finally this year it happened. Perspectives change with spiritual growth & Christmas lights are a bi-product of that this year! :) Such freedom we have in Christ!

Although Thanksgiving is a meaningful holiday for our family, it has been our goal to make giving thanks a daily practice. Not just something we concentrate/focus on in a big way once-a-year yet something we are mindful of every moment of every day. Recognizing the little as well as the big things. Being grateful for the easy as well as the hard; the joyful as well as the difficult. Seeing the painful as a blessing all the while knowing God ALWAYS has a plan & a purpose.

Be joyful always; pray continually;

give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

 

 

It takes discipline.

Having eyes open.

Viewing life as a gift.

Speaking the thanks.

Writing the thanks.

Offering up the thanks.

 

The tree is nearly finished.

The living room is a wreck.

Our hearts are full.

Tiredness looms.

Laughter has been ringing off of the walls of our home this evening & the COLORFUL lights outside twinkle with JOY! ♥

 

 

Tonight as with all nights, we are thankful...

 

♥ Kyle ♥

♥My best friend, my bride, my honey, my wife (I didn't coax him...I promise...)

♥My girls...

♥Freedom in Christ...

 

♥ Mal ♥

♥My mom...(I didn't coax her...I promise...)

♥Drives in the country...

♥Books...

♥Wind...

♥Sunday evenings with special friends...

♥Summertime swims...

♥Christmas lights & tinsel...

♥Cheetah print leggings...(She wore them today...)

 

♥ MaKayla ♥

♥Incandescently happy moments...

♥A happy family...

♥A home of safety...

♥Projects of creativity...

♥My sister who is my best friend...

♥My ocean; my soul sister...Her name is Bri...

♥The unique place in life that God has me...

 

♥ Mendi ♥

♥A faithful covenant with my Maker...

♥A faithful covenant with my man...

♥Beautiful, healthy children who love & long for God...

♥Deliverance from bondage that once held me captive...

♥The reality that I. Am. Loved.

♥Life to the full...

 

As we prepare to close out this day, we give thanks to God...

The giver of all gifts...

 

 

*By the way...The tree is beautiful! ♥

 

Drawn...

It's been a beautiful day here in the country surrounding the O'Riley home. Bidding Kyle farewell this morning as he left for work, the stars were shining & the air was damp. I always love taking in a deep breath of fresh air as I walk him out the door & send him on his way with lunchbox & coffee in hand. ♥

Mallary has been so determined this school year in setting her alarm & getting right up and around for the day at 7:00 a.m. She typically stumbles into the kitchen where I am sitting at the table doing my Bible study. ;) After our "good morning" greetings & a few hugs, she traipses on to the bathroom to prepare herself for breakfast & the start of another school day. This morning she whizzed right through her studies & was done in record time. It hasn't always been this way with Mal... In years past I have had to prod & pry to keep her focused & going. This year she has really stepped up to the plate & given it her all with no complaining...at all. We started out with a new math program this year & after about eight weeks & repeated attempts, we resorted back to old faithful Saxon. Last year she HATED it... This year she LOVES it & has a totally new appreciation for "being taught" after the failed attempt at something new. It's been such a joy to see her mature & become more responsible with every day. ♥

#454 ~ Hands that willingly help
#455 ~ Love notes from twelve-year-olds ♥
#461 ~ Hands all cracked

MaKayla set her mind to cutting fabric and fabric and fabric and more fabric today. As a matter of fact, I think she sat on the dining/living room floor for about 5 1/2 hours cutting fabric. She was never so glad to be done. We had settled on making certain Christmas gifts for everyone in our family but then when we started counting the cost, we decided to switch gears & do something different. A few weeks ago we spent over two hours in Hobby Lobby looking, scaling & contemplating styles, colors & designs just right for each person on her list. Talk about a draining activity... Especially at 7:00 at night... We are both pretty excited about the projects she is preparing to put together! :) Since she's still missing one major component needed for each gift, she has had to exercise much patience & perseverance in cutting fabric rather than jumping to assembling. I admire her diligence & love for creating. ♥

I have kept busy today working on some follow-up study & correspondence with the ladies I am blessed to share a Monday night Bible study with. Digging a little deeper in order to find answers to questions. Encouraging them to keep pushing through, knowing victory in certain areas of life & marriage are within arms reach. It's been an intense study & one that I only wish I had been able to take part in prior to exchanging vows with Kyle. So much truth I was unaware of. So many things that women need to know in order to be fruitful wives for their husbands. So much training in the area of who God is in our lives as individuals & as help meets to the men we are blessed to complete. Lots of stretching & sharpening going on.

#467 ~ Squeals of excitement from the mouths of two girls eager for upcoming
            Thanksgiving/Christmas preparations ♥
#469 ~ Ice cold water
#470 ~ My sister ♥

As the girls & I have gone about our day doing school, cutting fabric, fixing meals, preparing food for Kyle to take to work tomorrow, folding laundry, gathering some of our fall/Thanksgiving decorations to be put away in preparation for Christmas adornment to be put in place, my heart couldn't help but be drawn to people who this time of year isn't so "happy", "cheerful", "desirable". People who are lonely, grieving, hurting, struggling, surviving... So many times we get so tunnel visioned that we lose perspective of how blessed & rich we are. That our spouses are faithful. That our kids are healthy. That we have food to eat & clothes to wear. That our homes are warm, comfortable & full of love. That my husband has a job, I have a washer that works & we have clean water to drink. That I have church friends who care enough about me to pray for me, love me & encourage me. That...

#430 ~ French toast with lots of powdered sugar on a Monday morning
#432 ~ Fresh, crisp, frost-bitten morning
#433 ~ Carmeled apples all decked out

As I thought of those I know & those I don't, I am stirred to pray for them. Although I may not know who they are, God does. And the ones I do know, I battle on their behalf. For strength. Endurance. Faith. To be able to see Jesus clearly in the midst of the storm despite the wind & waves until the clouds clear & the rainbow appears. It will. It always does. It's about looking beyond that which is killing us inside & seeing grace in the face of Christ. When I know people I love are being taunted by Satan, it makes. me. angry. It compels me to battle & wage war all the more. He will not win. It's declared in the Word of God & that Word stands true.

Today, I give God praise for who He is & all He is in my life. How honored I am to serve Him in the capacities in which He has called me. Child. Wife. Momma...

#436 ~ Incandescently happy days declared by Mal ♥
#453 ~ Hard correction
#454 ~ Freshly plowed fields

It's been a beautiful day I am am thankful... ♥

O give thanks unto the LORD, for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever.

Psalm 107:1

It's A Choice...

Quiet morning around our home...
MaKayla & Mal are still sleeping...
Kyle is spending his day at work today...
I had tentative plans that I was greatly looking forward to...
But a list quite lengthy kept me here at home...

Last night was a restless night for me...
I went to bed with "stuff" on my mind...
My heart & my spirit were unsettled...
No fault of anyone other than myself...

As I laid there throughout the sleepless hours, I found myself asking God why I struggle in certain areas... Why I seem to trip on certain hurdles every time they are in my path... Why I get hung up on situations & circumstances that aren't mine out there for approval or acceptance... Why can't I just get it...

Without fail...
When I ask...
Am silent...
Choose to listen...

He answers...

Firmly...
Gently...
Without room for further question...

"Mendi, the reason to all your whys is very simple. You choose. You choose to struggle. You choose to trip. You choose to get hung up. You choose to not get it. You choose, My child. You choose."

The answer I was given has continued to ring loud & clear through my heart, mind & spirit this morning. And when I really think it through, allowing the answer to penetrate into the core of who I am, it all boils down to my will. What my will chooses. Who my will submits to. How surrendered my will is to the will of the One who knows best.

Situations come & situations go. Some I invite. Some are completely out of my control. God promises that in each & every situation, regardless of what it is, He will show me who I am to be. How I am to respond. What I am to say.

He vows to show me the way.
Every. Time.
Without fail.

It's my choice whether or not I listen to His leading. And when I listen & hear what He is saying, it's my choice what I do with the direction I've been given.

The problem lies within myself.

All-too-often, I choose to go the opposite direction He is telling me to go.
I choose to handle the situation my own way...
The way of the flesh...
The way of emotion...
The way of impulse...

This lands me unsettled.
Regretting.
Sorrowful.
Condemned.
Exactly where Satan wants me.

It's in these moments that I am grateful for grace.
Forgiveness.
Jesus.

I am learning the fine line of choice. And although I am learning the hard way, much too late in life, I am grateful that the One who loves me most, never gives up on teaching me...training me...disciplining me...

So today, as I reflect on the state of my will...
I desire to surrender it to Christ.
To listen.
To learn.
To be taught.
To submit.
To choose...

His way.

The way of no regrets.
No sorrows.
No condemnation.
No reality of being unsettled.

His way is right where He wants me & that is right where I want to be.

As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless.

He is a shield for all who take refuge in him.

Psalm 18:30

 

 

I Wonder...

School books are put away & although I have a Bible study that I am eager to dig into, after contemplating & recontemplating a nice facebook prompting from a tried & true friend, I opted to do a quick blog post. I have about decided that I need to choose...facebook or blog. It's hard to "keep up" with both & when I give attention to one, the other suffers & vice versa. I think there's a Scripture in God's Word about that...

"No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other,

or he will be devoted to one and despise the other.

You cannot serve God and wealth."

Matthew 6:24

 

Although this verse is specific to money, it seems to mirror so many other areas in life as well. That which we feed is that which is going to grow & take up space in our lives whatever it may be. All we have to do is to look at our time, our checkbooks, our cupboards, our calendars... That which it holds is that which is most valuable to us. That which it contains is that which has most important place in our lives. A sobering reality... So, I continue to seek God as far as facebook... I love being "connected" to people that I otherwise would not be able to keep in touch with... Nurses from Kyle's surgery/illness. Far away friends. Family that I don't see often. Yet I wonder, is the "connection" worth what it is costing in the long run... Time. Attention. I would admit that I "enjoy" social media. Probably more than I should. What about it is so drawing to people? How do people get so "addicted" to it? What is so compelling about it that causes people to log on & check it multiple times in a day? Believe me, I've thought this through more times than I can count. It seems that some people want "to be in the know" & some people simply want "to be heard"...

 

How much of it truly glorifies God? I mean really, some of the things I see & read is shocking to me... 

 

How much of what people post is drama? They get on a band wagon & spew away... Saying things that are really no one else's business. Making certain situations & circumstances so much bigger than they are. Involving people that have no reason to be involved. 

 

How many times do we tell the world those things which God, Himself wishes we would just tell Him? That we love Him. That we believe Him. That we believe prayer changes things. We post it to the world but do we truly take the time to share those things with Him personally?

 

How often do what we see changes our view of others? Believe me, facebook allows one to see another for who they really are. What they do. How they live. The things they say. What their deepest convictions really hinge on. Sometimes, I see things that cause me to view people differently than how God would desire me to view them & then I wonder, "Why do I do this to myself?"

 

How regularly are we spending time "connecting" with those in the outside world, when we should be "connecting" with those in our own presence? Or doing something constructive? Or investing those moments in the here & now responsibilities that God has entrusted to us?

 

And then there's the whole "approval" arena. If enough people "like" our status, it's a rush. It boosts confidence. It means were "accepted". And if they don't "like" it, well then it must mean they are mad or don't agree or don't care or like someone else better.

 

I wonder if we calculated the amount of minutes we spent/times we logged on to facebook & designated that many minutes to deliberate Bible reading/study, if our desire & hunger for social media would wane. If our desire & hunger for Christ would increase.

 

I know some who are just "creepers"... They get on, read the gossip, keep up with people of "interest" but never comment. They do it just to "keep in the know".

 

Several months ago as I was contemplating this (see I have been thinking it over for quite some time), the Lord revealed some very distinct things to me regarding social media/facebook/twitter, ect. He showed me areas of product in relation to these ways of "connecting & communicating"...

*time stealer

*jealousy instigator

*offense initiator

*pride inviter

*attention separator

*judgement antagonizer

*tempter

   *mentally

   *spiritually

   *emotionally

 

I'm not saying it affects all people in all these ways. I've just recognized them in my own heart/mind/spirit at various times & I have a feeling they do the same to others. And only a few days after He revealed the above to me, He brought this verse to vivid light:

 

Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody. 1 Thessalonians 4:11-12

 

I love sharing the light & love of Jesus on facebook. I love being an encourager. A prayer warrior for things that otherwise I may not know about. I love seeing pictures of faces that otherwise I would miss seeing. I love being warmed & inspired by others. But then I wonder... Is it worth what it is costing me???

 

Time. Unrighteous thoughts. Unsettled feelings. Time. Judgemental tendencies.

 

 Some people enjoy being "fed" by these things; personally, I don't.

 

I really don't need the "approval" from others. I don't need to be heard. I don't need to be "liked". I don't need to know everyone else's business. I don't need to have my opinion of others negatively influenced. Plain & simple, I long to be smack dab in the center of God's will.

 

I wonder if my life would be simpler to just return to blogging where I would have one "outlet" to focus on...

 

Just a little something (or a big something) I'm praying about...

 

 

At the same time they also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house;

and not merely idle, but also gossips and busybodies, talking about things not proper to mention.

1 Timothy 5:13

 

We hear that some among you are idle. They are not busy; they are busybodies.

2 Thessalonians 3:11

 

 



This moment...

Kyle's phone alarm goes off at 5:00 a.m. signaling that the night has passed & a new day has dawned. He resets it for 5:30 & snuggles in close to me...

Kyle's phone alarm goes off at 5:30 signaling that another 30 minutes have passed & it is NOW time to REALLY get UP... He snuggles in close for just a few more minutes & then pulls himself from our warm bed.

A fresh, new day has embarked on this life, our life.
Tired? Yes.
Would love a little (or a lot) more sleep? Absolutely.

Kyle is now off to work.
The girls still sleep.
Crazy-busy weekend & both were feeling a little scratchy in the throat last night.
Essential oil diffuser & rest will do them good.

As I move about around the house this morning thinking about what this day, this week will hold, my mind becomes a stir. The Lord reminds me to refocus... On the here & now... This moment...

I pour me a hot cup of coffee that Kyle brewed... Just. For. Me. before he left.
I put last night's dishes in their appointed places...
I look around the kitchen...
I am reawakened to the reality of how blessed I am.

A heaping bowl of fresh fruit sitting on the kitchen table.
An unopened container of apple juice that MaKayla requested from the store.
Bananas neatly hanging from their rack.
Electricity.
Water.
Clothing.
Bible study books & The Book that clarifies it all.
Pens.
Paper.
A candle warmly burning.
Health.
Love...

A God who meets my every need from the smallest to the greatest.
A husband who works tirelessly to provide for our family.

A God who loves me in depths that I will never fully know until I see Him face-to-face.
A husband who loves me/our girls with no conditions.

A God who longs to commune & fellowship with me every moment of every day.
A husband who invests every free moment in the lives of MaKayla, Mal & I.

I look around & I am thankful.
I. Am. Blessed.
I. Am. Loved.
I. Am. Adored.
I. Am. Provided for.

The two most important relationships in my life are ones that complete me.
They make me who I am.
My Creator.
My husband.
They are my all-in-all.

How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!

How vast is the sum of them! 

Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand.

Psalm 139:17-18

 

Look around you today...

Count your blessings...

Name them one-by-one...

Count your many blessings...

See what God has done...

 

 

Plain & Simple...

It's a quiet, rainy morning here. The girls & I are all gathered around the kitchen table, each doing our own thing, yet blessedly in the comfort of one another's company. Mal, writing a report for school. MaKayla, working on her Bible Study. Myself, conversing with a sister-friend of mine via e-mail. In the midst of the messy, overflowing table sits a warm candle burning. My life & my heart are full to overflowing. Plain & simple.

Our days & weeks have continued to be quite busy, even to the point of needing to reschedule a "sew date" tomorrow. Disappointing? Absolutely. Freeing? For sure.

Through both the 'Fruit of the Spirit' study MaKayla, Mal & I are participating in on Sunday mornings & the study I am leading on Monday evenings, God has been repeatedly impressing on my heart the necessity of seeking out the Holy Spirit's filling, guidance & work in my life...DAILY. Seeking Him to fill & refill & fill some more. A fresh filling with each new day that I awake to. I'm sure I knew the importance of this, however I have been reminded distinctly through each of these studies that the only way I can live a fruitful, victorious & selfless life is to be refilled anew on a daily basis with the power & presence of the Holy Spirit. In & of myself I am a carnal body of flesh that seeks after my own desires yet through the filling of the Spirit, I am intimately connected to the One who created me & loves me most. And when I am intimately connected to Him on the deepest level, I am able to live out who He desires me to be. And as I live out who He desires me to be, He produces fruit through me. And as that fruit is produced, others are touched by Christ. The "others" being my family & those I am in contact with.

The more God deals with me & teaches me on this, the more I recognize the reality of His presence & control in my life. The more control He has, the less I think of self. The less I think of self, the more I am able to see the hearts & needs of others. The more I am able to see the hearts & needs of others, the more fruit He is able to pour out through me. The more fruit He pours out, the more others are being nurtured, affirmed, cared for, encouraged & comforted. The more others are being nurtured, affirmed, cared for, encouraged & comforted, the more God is glorified.

I feel abundantly blessed to be a vessel. A chosen vessel.

I pray that as I allow the Holy Spirit to fill me, others will see Jesus & in turn will have a deeper desire to know Him, to love Him, to serve Him. Even if the "others" are no one besides Kyle, MaKayla & Mal... ♥

Being reminded...

As I begin a new day I am reminded why I am here.
Why God has placed me here.
Why I am where I am.

He reminds me in this new day that first & foremost I was created for His pleasure.
To commune with Him.
To fellowship with Him.
To glorify Him.
~In my thoughts...
~In my words...
~In my actions...
~In my reactions...

He reminds me that He has very distinct purpose for me in this day.
Not only to please Him, but to make much of Him in the moments ahead.
For me, that is serving, honoring & nurturing those He has entrusted to me.
~In my thoughts...
~In my words...
~In my actions...
~In my reactions...

He reminds me that this doesn't "just happen".
It is only through the filling & the power of the Holy Spirit.

          "...be filled with the Spirit." Ephesians 5:18

He reminds me that I MUST be deliberate in petitioning that filling in my life.
It's God who does the filling, yet it's me who must do the asking.
If I fail to ask, seek, petition, will I be filled?
He longs for me to ask for that which He desires to give.

So today, I ask.
I want a fresh filling.
A filling that overflows.
Spilling from He to me.
From me to those I touch.
For it's only through the filling that the fruit can be ripe & ready.
Love.
Joy.
Peace.
Patience.
Kindness.
Goodness.
Faithfulness.
Gentleness.
Self-control.

And as I obey, the Spirit will produce nourishing fruit.
Through Him, it will be distributed to those whom I touch in this day.
It will be appropriated & those I touch will know it is Him.
They will see Him.
Feel Him.
Hear Him.
Be touched by Him.

He reminds me that I am His vessel today.
I am here to be poured out.
For the blessing of others.
For His honor & glory.
~In my thoughts...
~In my words...
~In my actions...
~In my reactions...

"...be filled with the Spirit." Ephesians 5:18

 

 

He Will Supply...

What a beautiful morning to walk Kyle out the door to his car as he prepared to leave for work. A cool brisk breeze. The twinkling of lingering stars. The brightness of a beautiful moon. The stillness of the night about to break into the light of morning.

Refreshing.
Exhilirating.
Renewing.
Just what I needed to start my new day.

I have come to the conclusion that unless I put "BLOG" on my "TO-DO" list, I just don't set aside the time to sit & write awhile. I am praying about designating a window of time every day to think, reflect & share but with the fullness of life in our home right now, I will wait patiently for the Lord to show me what His will is.

With everyone beyond tired the other night, we found ourselves in bed much earlier than normal. As is my nature, I carried along my Bible, journal & current studies/reads that I am enveloped in. Kyle & I chatted a bit & as he dozed off to sleep, I began to study. Awhile later he said, "Are you not tired?" Oh, I was, but to be honest, I don't want to miss a moment of the miracle of life around our home. I save my study time for when Kyle has left for work & before the girls arise, while they are gone fulfilling commitments or after everyone is in bed. When I am engaged in any project whether it is something I am creating or a study of God's Word, I can get quite cranky if I must get pulled away therefore it's best to do those things when everyone else is occupied. :) Kyle doesn't necessarily agree as he says I need to TAKE time for things I want & need to do... So after much discussion, we agree to disagree... ♥

The older I get, the more I LOVE to study. I think homeschooling the girls has done that to me. Growing up, I was a terrible student. I didn't study. I paid no attention to assignments or grades. I did just what was needed in order to "make it through". As the girls have grown throughout the years, the Lord has changed my desire from making sure they succeed & excel to cultivating their hearts. Instilling in them a LOVE for learning. Making sure their minds & their hearts are connected in that learning process. That learning & education aren't just things to get done... Things to muddle through... Things to accomplish... Yet it's a journey to enjoy. And through that process, the Lord has instilled in me a desire & a longing to learn of Him. To be taugh things I didn't know or have things I did know take on new meaning & perspective. Sometimes we can get so stale in our doctrines, beliefs & convictions that we are deaf-earred, blind-eyed, calloused-heart to the "new" that God desires to teach us. When that happens, we miss so much...

So as I continue on in the three studies I am enveloped in, I am grateful for what God is bringing ALIVE in my heart...
*who I see God as...
*what God expects/desires of me as a bride to Kyle...
*what LIVING the Fruit of the Spirit looks like...
*how God desires me to "see" difficult situations in life...
*the view He longs for me to have in the hard of life...
*what He desires me to do with what He is pouring in to me...
*to evaluate how His character is being displayed in my day-to-day life...
*to examine my life continuously, being mindful of what is present that shouldn't be...

Most of these things seem like elementary concepts yet God desires to constantly be turning the soil of our hearts so that new seed can be sown. So that new growth can spring forth. So that abundant fruit can be grown. So that His harvest will be plentiful.

The last three weeks have been overwhelming trying to "get on top of it all" yet His grace has been so satisfyingly sufficient.
It's pushing forward.
Persevering.
Leaning on His strength rather than my own.

In the midst of it all, He has shown me through His Spirit & through His Word that as we willingly receive that which He has entrusted to us, being good stewards & faithful grounds keepers, He will supply the ability & strength to accomplish that which He believes we can do. We base so much of what we accomplish on what we feel we are capable of rather than just focusing on that which He has placed into our care. Being diligent to put our hands to the plow knowing... He will NEVER ask more of us than His grace is sufficient to supply.

It's been a great learning season for me.
Not just in knowledge...
But in fully trusting God to give me the strength & ability.

As everyone left last night from our in-home Bible Study, Kyle & I just looked at each other & acknowledged how good & awesome God is. How faithful & provisional... How amazing & wonderful...

It's a joy to serve Him...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the back of the truck rides in the fall...

 

Caring for a rehabilitating puppy...

Bow shoots with Dad...

Perfectly BBQ'd grilled chicken...(by Kyle of course ♥)

What our living room floor typically looks like...

Sillyness between Grandma Sharon & Tuck...

Our new wall creation...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn,
shining ever brighter till the full light of day.
Proverbs 4:18

 

More In Love...

Today has been a beautiful day for me... ♥
Typical first-of-the-morning routine...
Up with my man... ♥
Bible study... ♥
Waking chats with my girls on the couch... ♥
Bagels & peanut butter with notes etched on top ...♥
Coffee made with love by MaKayla... ♥
Bible study... ♥
School... ♥
Bible Study... ♥
Still in our jammies... ♥
An unexpected knock at the door... ♥
Joyful hellos... ♥
Warm embraces... ♥
An invitation to spend some time... ♥
A spontaneous decision... ♥
Very much unlike me... ♥
Something I needed... ♥
God saw... ♥
God knew... ♥
Grace... ♥

Mal is well into her school routine for the year & since Kyle continues to have every Friday off of work, it's only four day weeks at this point. :) She loves the curriculum we are using this year & her diligence is inspiring.

MaKayla has found her niche here at home. Bible studies. Moments to journal. Willingness in meals. In dishes. In life. Blessed.

Kyle works so hard & perseveres to provide for our family. To lead us. To guide us. To nurture us in the ways of the Lord.

Life for me is good. Blessed. Stretching. Housework. School. Meals. Bible study. A husband. Two girls. Beautiful.

Leading two studies & participating in one keeps me deeply in the Word on a daily basis. I'm loving every second of it yet at times processing all the seeds that the Lord is sowing on my heart is big. Hard. Overwhelming. Heavy. Making sure the soil is tilled, fertilized & prepared so that those seeds can deeply implant themselves. Even in the bigness, I'm loving every second of it.

This coupled with a few other situations that feel as planks resting on my shoulders has me in a more humbled state than I ever remember being. I am more grateful for grace than ever. I am more aware of His presence than ever. I am more perceptive to His instruction than ever. I am more in love with my Jesus than ever.

As I study, I find that God's Word comes more alive & real to me than I can ever remember before. The essence of the ink & the Truth it holds radiates redemption, freedom, correction & healing as I've never experienced before. It generates questions. Evaluation. Meditation. In a raw way it is riveting my heart & compelling me to seek God as I never have before. It's bringing things to light in ways that I have never understood or comprehended before.

The other evening as Kyle & the girls were in Worship Team Practice, I stole away to a room in the church to study & pray. I sprawled my body out across a row of chairs as I delved into The Word. One of my closest friends found me there & flopped her body across a row of chairs near me. She. Me. Laying there. I asked her at what point she was in the study. We talked. I shared. Tears fell. She listened. I bore my heart as to how God has been tilling up the soil in my heart. Breaking hard ground. Chiseling away those masses that have kept me from truly seeing... I asked her if the study had been speaking to her in the same way. Had it brought to light any of the same things that it had to me. ♥

Earlier in the week I initiated a texting conversation with someone who shares my life blood. We chatted about some of the things I have been learning. Searching. Wondering about. How did she see it? I love digesting God's Word & then discussing it & being sharpened by those closest to me. I love being stretched. Spending time only with those who think the same way as you & who agree with you on everything is boring. :o\ I love it when I can visit with someone who holds me accountable & puts things into a different perspective for me. Who can say, "Yeah, I think you're on the right track," (if they believe I am), or is bold enough to say, "Ya know, I'm not sure I see it that way... This is how I see it." That's one way I grow. ♥

Yesterday the one who bore me life shared a portion of my day. Blessed moments. Tough conversations. Tense moments. Love trumps all. She assured me that the hard I am doing in certain situations; some day, one day, will be okay. One way or another, I know she's right. For the hard; resolved or unresolved, doesn't change Who God is. ♥

Although the God I serve is the same yesterday, today & forever, at this season of my life, He is revealing Himself to me in fresh & profound ways. It's big. It's humbling. It's overwhelming. I'm loving every second of it.

Today was a beautiful day for me. ♥

There is no one holy like the Lord

there is no one besides you;

there is no Rock like our God.

1 Samuel 2:2

From The Inside Out...

Life has been crazy, busy, full, abundant, chaotic & a little stressful.
Just ask my family.

We had planned to start school on Monday & in our planning we crawled into bed at 9:30 Sunday night in order to get a good night of sleep for the 5:00 a.m. alarm. At 11:30 we were awakened to Kyle's cell phone ringing due to a family emergency needing our presence. Kyle & I quickly rushed around & headed out the door, arriving back home at 2:30 a.m. The alarm on his phone sounded at 5:00 letting us know it was time to arise... At 5:20 a.m. my cell phone rang, asking for/needing our presence once again. That's how Monday started...

Kyle & I are hosting a small group Bible study in our home on Monday evenings & since this Monday happened to be the first of our meetings, we had planned a special kick-off with a meal. My day was spent in the kitchen preparing while the girls were away attending to an imminent situation that needed their (most especially MaKayla's) attention. The house got cleaned. The food got prepared. The kick-off went great. The spirit was sweet. The fellowship was refreshing. The evening was a blessing. That's how Monday ended...

That was the start of our week...

Tuesday was full of school, study, housework & small instances of catch-up from Monday being so crazy.
Wednesday was full of school, study, housework, study, errands & study... Kyle & I are not only leading a Monday evening study here in our home but we are both leading individual groups on Wednesday evenings at church as well. This means lots of study time...for both of us.

In the midst of all of we have had going on, we've had some (multiple) burdensome personal situations that are so very heavy on our hearts. Situations where our desire is to glorify God yet I humbly admit that the sinfulness of our flesh wants it's own selfish way. You know, one of those, "The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak" situations... So, in chaos of the busyness of life, I have been searching, seeking, digging, scratching to find the perfection of God in each of these situations.
Who am I to be?
What am I to do?
How am I to respond?
Which parts am I to own?

Making much of Jesus in the hard moments in life.
Moments that aren't just moments...situations...circumstances...
Moments that affect & impact people I care about...
People God cares about...

It isn't coincidental that the past two weeks our Beth Moore study has been focused on the particular fruit of "Patience"...
Living it out.
Working it out.
Allowing God to manifest it in my life.
Especially in the hard moments...

I'm learning.
I'm convicted.
I'm being stretched.
God is transforming me from the inside out.

Easy? Not necessarily.
Enjoyable? I can think if funner things.
Exciting? Yes.

Regardless of the hardness, I desire God.
I desire God's best.
I desire God's will.
I desire God.
More. Than. Anything.

So...
I continue to search, seek, dig & scratch.
I continue to pray, listen, read & journal.
I continue to hunger...
For God.

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Jeremiah 29:13

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out

In my heart and my soul
Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out,
Lord, let justice and praise
Become my embrace
To love You from the inside out.