It is the start of a new month...
"Welcome, October. We are blessed to greet you."
Life around our home continues to move forward.
Some of us remain in survival mode.
Some are toiling to see the reality of healing (spiritual, emotional, mental, physical-the whole gamut).
Some are beginning to face the reality of a mixed up, crazy September.
Some are taking life in stride, facing each day as it comes with no expectation of tomorrow.
In one way or another, we respond.
And many times our responses are based on how we've been raised.
Or what we've been taught.
Or the level of our faith.
Or influences we are surrounded by.
Regardless, we respond.
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- unapproachable -
not capable of being approached
remote
unreachable
impossible to equal or rival
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The word above is the label some have placed on our family.
The definition below the word is it's description.
As I've said in previous posts, I am a digger. I want to understand. So when myself, or someone within my sphere is deemed as something specific, I want to know what that looks like.
How people "see" us.
"Process" us.
"Perceive" us.
The reality of those spoken words was heartbreaking yet heart changing.
I long for God to turn every negative into a positive.
For what Satan intends for evil, my faithful God will work for good.
As I discussed this "definition" in regard to our family with a friend, the comment was made, "It's as if you've built up walls."
Their synopsis was correct.
I won't deny something that I know is truth.
I won't lie.
I won't pretend that what they were saying wasn't correct.
As I mulled over in my mind the essence of our conversation, the word "handicap" surfaced.
I'm a handicap.
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- handicap -
the disadvantage or advantage itself
any disadvantage that makes success more difficult
a physical or mental disability especially one that makes ordinary activities of daily living difficult
to attempt to predict the winner of, as by comparing past performances of the contestants
to assign odds for or against any particular contestant.
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Along the pathway of life, I've built walls as a means to:
*survive
*cope
*defend
*endure
*protect
Haven't we all?
Aren't we all handicapped?
There are signs designating.
There are areas reserved.
There are spaces strategically constructed.
But what about for those of us whose handicap isn't of the physical form?
Rather instead, of the emotional? Mental? Spiritual?
We sit in the same seats as everyone else.
We park in similar slots.
We use the same restrooms.
Our tables are "normal".
Our carts push the same.
And no one notices us with a cane. Or a walker. Or a wheelchair.
But they're there.
Invisibly, they are there.
As Mal & I sat at the table the other morning, she, doing her school, me, studying/reading. She glanced at me & said, "What are you thinking about?" ♥ So I asked her the question, "What are some things you see that have happened in people's lives that have adversely affected them?" I was amazed that her response didn't include the cause of the adverse effects, but the effects themselves...
*insecurity
*fear
*depression
*isolation
Her thoughts began where mine left off... ♥
We talked awhile longer before she refocused & took back off on her work. But as we chatted, we both agreed that a diverse assortment of "life struggles" have shifted people from the advantage to the disadvantage.
Advantage to disadvantage.
I wonder if they realize it?
Or if they just...
cope...
survive...
do life...
REJECTION
ILLNESS
DIVORCE
VERBAL ABUSE
POVERTY
DEATH
HUMILIATION
BARRENNESS
ADULTERY
EMOTIONAL SCARS
LOSS
UNEMPLOYMENT
RAPE
TEENAGE PREGNANCY
BANKRUPTCY
A WAYWARD CHILD
Can you relate?
Things that have happened...
Some we could have done differently.
Some completely beyond our control.
Do you feel you've been...
branded
tattooed
labeled
marked
And in turn we are left with...
insecurity
fear
depression
isolation
anger
bitterness
anxiety
weakness
Or the more obvious...
alcoholism
nicotine dependency
uncontrolled spending
busyness
unhealthy relationships
Sadly, there isn't a specially marked spiritual/mental/emotional handicap section in churches.
We all sit in the same room.
In the same seats.
We all read the same Bible.
Take the same communion.
Sing the same songs of worship.
We all pray to the same sovereign God.
Long for the same depth of acceptance.
And desire to grow closer to same Savior who gave His life to save us.
The crux of it is, we all bear a handicap.
And we all wear it differently.
It's not an excuse.
It's a reality.
Right or wrong, it is what it is.
It doesn't mean that we remain in our disabled state...
It means we come alongside of one another through the means of prayer & encouragement.
More love.
Less judgement.
Abundant compassion.
Diminished criticism.
What handicaps does your heart bear?
How do you wear it?
Thankfully, God sees the heart & He knows the intentions of man.
He sees our hurts.
He sees what we are made of.
He longs to heal us.
He reassures us with His love
He yearns to cover us with His grace.
He reminds us that we. are. His.
The LORD your God is with you,
He is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.
~Zephaniah 3:17~
