"If only we had known 20 plus years ago what we are learning & teaching now..."
As we sat on the couch together I shared with him how inadequate I feel in leading the study us women are working through. I feel so ill-equipped & lacking in guiding these sisters-in-Christ that I also call my friends, to be the wives/women that God desires. To be the wives/women that Scripture instructs. To respect our husbands & to submit to them in EVERYTHING... To respond rather than to react in EACH situation & circumstance that we encounter even when we don't exactly see eye-to-eye or even remotely the same. When it comes down to the brass tacks of it all, the "idea" of living these things out seems aspiring yet, being resolute & deliberately doing it is entirely another thing... It is hard... I know for myself, had I known then (June 29, 1991) when I started this journey, what I know now, my marriage to Kyle would have looked very different over the years. I would have chosen to nag less, been deficient in controlling & ceased to demand my own way. Sadly, in most cases the opposite was true of me... I see now where these attributes have crippled both he & I, as well as our family from flourishing into what God desired us to be. I now see the truth... The scales are gone... My eyes are opened... I no longer want to "lord it over him (Kyle)" as the Scripture speaks... I long to submit & I long to respect...in EVERYTHING.
I'm thankful for where God has brought me & I'm thankful for what He is still teaching me yet fully living those instructions & imparting them to others is a tough thing. In so many areas we feel justified for not respecting. In so many situations we feel our way is better. In so many circumstances submitting to the headship of the men God has placed over our lives seems less than desirable. Yet even in those areas, situations & circumstances, God's Word stands true. He doesn't "suggest" those things of us, He instructs us to obey them. And He promises that if we obey, He will be faithful.
As I sit on the living room floor this morning wrapping gifts for a special someone who tomorrow will become a teenager :), my heart is bittersweet... In a sense it is heavy... I am grateful for the freedom we gain when we are enlightened to the Truth (John 8:31-32), yet burdened because teaching & encouraging such instruction is hard... Especially when there are situations & circumstances in the lives of people I love (near & far) where I want to say, "You are justified..." "You are exempt..." "You are excused..."
God simply doesn't give me that right... For myself... For anyone else... His Word is His Word & His Word speaks Truth.
God is doing great things & He is changing hearts through what we are studying & learning but as in all things, being stretched & being challenged can often times be painful. As they say, "No pain, no gain." It all boils down to choice... Will I continue to insist that my way is better or will I submit to the leadership of the man who holds my heart? Will I respect Kyle even when I don't see things the same way he does or will I demand that I am right? Will I continue to choose my own will or will I choose the will of the Father?
I pray that God's grace would be abundantly sufficient as we journey forward. That even in the midst of those unexplainably tough lessons, that we would look beyond self & we would clearly see Him. For in it all & through it all, He is the Author & the Perfecter of our faith... He knows best...
Wives, be subject (be submissive and adapt yourselves) to your own husbands as [a service] to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the church, Himself the Savior of [His] body. As the church is subject to Christ, so let wives also be subject in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word, that He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such things [that she might be holy and faultless]. Even so husbands should love their wives as [being in a sense] their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself. For no man ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and carefully protects and cherishes it, as Christ does the church, because we are members (parts) of His body. For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is very great, but I speak concerning [the relation of] Christ and the church. However, let each man of you [without exception] love his wife as [being in a sense] his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly]. ~Ephesians 5:22-33
As I sit on the living room floor this morning wrapping gifts for a special someone who tomorrow will become a teenager :), my heart is bittersweet... In a sense it is heavy... I am grateful for the freedom we gain when we are enlightened to the Truth (John 8:31-32), yet burdened because teaching & encouraging such instruction is hard... Especially when there are situations & circumstances in the lives of people I love (near & far) where I want to say, "You are justified..." "You are exempt..." "You are excused..."
God simply doesn't give me that right... For myself... For anyone else... His Word is His Word & His Word speaks Truth.
God is doing great things & He is changing hearts through what we are studying & learning but as in all things, being stretched & being challenged can often times be painful. As they say, "No pain, no gain." It all boils down to choice... Will I continue to insist that my way is better or will I submit to the leadership of the man who holds my heart? Will I respect Kyle even when I don't see things the same way he does or will I demand that I am right? Will I continue to choose my own will or will I choose the will of the Father?
I pray that God's grace would be abundantly sufficient as we journey forward. That even in the midst of those unexplainably tough lessons, that we would look beyond self & we would clearly see Him. For in it all & through it all, He is the Author & the Perfecter of our faith... He knows best...
Wives, be subject (be submissive and adapt yourselves) to your own husbands as [a service] to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the church, Himself the Savior of [His] body. As the church is subject to Christ, so let wives also be subject in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word, that He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such things [that she might be holy and faultless]. Even so husbands should love their wives as [being in a sense] their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself. For no man ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and carefully protects and cherishes it, as Christ does the church, because we are members (parts) of His body. For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is very great, but I speak concerning [the relation of] Christ and the church. However, let each man of you [without exception] love his wife as [being in a sense] his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly]. ~Ephesians 5:22-33
