Satisfy All My Longings...Fill All My Hollow Places...

I am currently working through Beth Moore's Bible study 'Breaking Free' and although I feel a tad bit behind in the "homework" portion of the study, I am gleaning much from what I am reading, pondering and taking in. Much of it I had previously learned when I read through her 'Get Out of That Pit' book several years ago but as I have studied and dug deep, the words have been confirming and my heart/mind/spirit have been refreshed. I wanted to share an excerpt with you...

"In my morning time with God, I ask Him to satisfy all my longings and fill all my hollow places with His lavish, unfailing love. This frees me from craving the approval of others and requiring them to fill my "cup." Then, if someone takes the time to demonstrate his or her love to me, that's the overflow! I am free to appreciate it and enjoy it, but I didn't emotionally require it!

See how the love of God that permeates the life through His Holy Spirit brings freedom? Not only am I freed, I am able to free others from having to boost me up emotionally all the time. Hallelujah! Where the Spirit of the Lord's lavish love is, there is freedom! Try it and see!

If we're not experiencing satisfaction, a hindrance exists and we want to identify it and ask God to remove it. Ordinarily, the primary hindrance to satisfaction in our lives is refusing Him access to our empty places."

I can distinctly remember when the Lord allowed this truth penetrate the core of my being and truly living it out became a reality...

This time three years ago Kyle was very ill battling his UC. We had made multiple trips to the Mayo Clinic and we were nearing the point where the doctors were closing in on making the decision that he needed to have a colectomy performed/an ileal pouch constructed. We had spent much time praying... We had tried every medicinal treatment option... We had turned it over to the Lord, trusting Him completely...

Once concluded that Kyle would definitely need surgery, the Lord distinctly spoke to me, "Mendi, this is a road that I desire for you to walk alone. I don't want you dependent on anyone but Me and Me alone. I have much to teach you through this season therefore I want you to set your sights upon Me, being careful to not look to the right or to the left."

This was way big for me as I have always been a "people person", reaching out to people as well as depending upon people, yet my heart was at peace and rest knowing God had a plan and it was something I didn't want to miss. I can remember gradually distancing myself from others so that I could follow hard after God on this intense journey. I knew that if I heard the voice of others, the voice of the Lord would be muffled. I knew that if I followed the direction of others, I would lose sight of the path the Lord desired for me/us to walk. I knew that if I sought the advice of others, God's direction would be foggy and unclear resulting in confusion. I knew that if I depended on others to keep me encouraged and uplifted, I would be let down and disappointed and I would be placing unfair expectations on those I loved the most. I was alone...with God...and it was the best place in the world that I could have been.

I learned much through that time of following hard after God and my relationship with Him flourished and grew in immeasurable ways, yet many of the friendships that I felt were close and true faltered. Others couldn't understand the "isolation" that I requested. They felt as though I was pushing them away. That I no longer wanted their companionship. That I no longer loved them. I remember writing letters to some of my closest friends explaining the "season" that God had requested me to walk through yet many of them couldn't imagine that it was God's voice that I was hearing.

That season was one of the most fruitful of my life thus far and when I shared with the girls in my accountability group one evening that I no longer needed people, they too had a hard time grasping the concept. I still love people! I love to be around people! I love to fellowship with people! I love to commune with people! I love to share with people yet I no longer need people! As Beth Moore stated, the reality of allowing God to satisfy all my longings and fill all my hollow places with His lavish, unfailing love, I have grown more in love with Jesus and I have freed others from the unattainable role of being my savior. No human can accomplish such a feat. Only One can do that for me...

...His name is Jesus...

P.S.) Thursday evening was one of those "overflow moments" for MaKayla, Mal and I as we were invited to go along with our sweet, dear and special friend Meg and her mom, Dawn to have her wedding dress fitted. You may recall a post written by MaKayla a few weeks ago where she mentioned Megan and the example she has been to MaKayla. Megan is a beautiful young woman who loves the Lord with all that she is and Kyle and I are so thankful for the influence she is on our girls. Spending the evening with these that we love so much was such a joy...joy unspeakable. Thank God for special overflow opportunities!