Late night.
Early morning.
Another busy day.
I am left feeling abundantly blessed. ♥
One of the many things that Kyle & I have discussed changing for our lives as individuals, our lives as a married team & our life as a family in 2014 is cashing in...
Cashing in on opportunities...
Invitations...
Fellowship...
Spontaneous memory-making moments...
But as Kyle's diagnosis with UC began unfolding several years ago...
And as the drive of ministry consumed us...
And life happened...
That changed.
Frequent trips to Rochester...
Hospital stays...
Treatments that compromised his immune system...
Medications that depleted his physical strength...
Stayed home more.
Ventured out less.
Self-protected.
And as ministry became more of a burden than a blessing...
Criticizing words...
Condemning comments...
The pressure to always be present...
Attempts to make all people happy & never succeeding...
Inwardly & outwardly coiled in.
Serving paralleled obligation.
Drop-by-drop, joy seeped ever so slowly out.
There are times in life where you just do what you have to do in order to make it work...
In order to keep going...
In order to survive...
Yet many times as one adapts to the process of survival, they forget...
Who they were...
What they enjoyed...
The essence of happiness...
How to live life to the fullest.
They become so accustomed to "self-protecting" that they fail to remember...
What that life...
The other life was like.
They cease from choosing life...
Abundant life...
(abundant = plentiful, ample, rich, abounding, overflowing)
A life of freedom.
Spontaneity.
Savoring the seconds.
Relishing the moments.
Living.
That was us...
And then God in His graciousness tears down walls...
Loosens chains...
Removes the grave clothes...
And one remembers.
And decides it's worth taking the chance.
Chooses to trust.
And discovers freshness of life.
So many things (chronic illness, ministry, financial stress, homeschooling criticism, ect) have played into the "prison" that both Kyle & I (and subsequently our girls) have felt encompassed by for many years. No one's fault but our own for allowing the walls to built as a method of protection during taxing, fearful & difficult seasons of life, yet it happened.
And now, God is allowing us to SEE...
At the start of every year, each of us, in our family, choose a word...
We seek God, pray & contemplate what He is speaking to our hearts that "thing" we need to work on, make our focus, & hone in the 365+ days ahead. It may seem like there are "many things" that need our attention yet as we pray & seek, He is faithful to make one thing apparently clear that He is longing to refine within us. We journal "the word", research it a bit & then pray some more as to how God wants to work it out in the hours, days, weeks, months & year before us. A heavenly college course, per se. :) A "topic/subject" that He wants us, with His direction & instruction", to master in order so that we may be used more effectively here & prepare us for there...Heaven. ♥ A "chapter" in this, our book of life on earth.
Individual words have been chosen & now the tutelage begins...
I'm thankful for a patient Instructor. ♥
At least three in our family have chosen words that aptly apply to the essence of this post...
Words that challenge us to move out of the "safe area" & into the vulnerable...
Out of the restricted & into the liberated...
Out of the charted waters of "self protection" & into the sea of God's divine security...
Words that stretch us in allowing God to uncover that which we have succumbed to burial...
So...
As we journeyed home (doing all we could to fight sleep & stay awake) at 12:45 this morning (with the reality that two of us had to be up at 5:30 a.m. & another one a little before 6:00 a.m.) following an evening with precious friends taking in the MIZZOU game, eating, chatting, pinteresting, screaming, yelling (at the television...like that does any good), and lots of strumming on some ukes, I was reminded that moments & memories can never be reclaimed. We hashed & rehashed the decision knowing the night would be late, the morning would be early & the day would be full yet Kyle & I recalled our discussion to do things differently this year... Despite the tired eyes & the weary body (sleep will eventually have the opportunity to come), I am thankful I have those moments & memories tucked deep... Moments & memories with people we love... Never to be taken from this heart of mine. Or Kyle's. Or MaKayla's. Or Mal's. ♥
A time for cashing in...
And seizing spontaneous memory-making moments... ♥
And yes, MIZZOU won...
And everyone went to bed happy...
It was a sweet victory. :)
In more ways than one... ♥
